Gay Marriage. Hmm...

So it's after 2am.  I got home from work almost two hours ago and after lying in bed for an hour tossing and turning I took Tylenol PM.  That didn't work so now I'm up trying the old fashioned remedy for sleeplessness - warm milk.  That doesn't seem to be helping either.  Here I am blogging, hoping that gets my thoughts out in the open and will allow me to get a couple hours of sleep.

Here a couple of days ago President Obama apparently changed his mind about Gay Marriage.  Was this truly a change of heart and belief, or a campaign year stunt?  I don't know that we'll ever know for sure.  But this along with Colorado's "Civil Unions" battle has fueled the debate over whether or not Gay Marriage is right or wrong.  And it is making me sort through my beliefs on the issue.

I was raised in a very right-wing conservative home.  A home where Dr. Dobson was listened to daily, and his opinion weighed more than lead balast.  The gospel according to Focus on the Family.  As such I feel that my understanding of things (life and hot button issues) sometimes is stunted.  Of course it isn't all Focus' fault; but now years later I still struggle to come to terms with what I, not another person or group, truly believes.  For all of us this process of weighing our beliefs is highly important, and I believe vital to becoming your own person - and a person who is genuine.

The topic of Gay Marriage tends to bring out overly simplistic, reactionary, thought processes from people.  And I don't know if "thought processes" is even the right thing to say as it doesn't seem that many people have their own opinion of the topic.  Speaking of Christians - it seems that the easy answer is "Gay Marriage is wrong, because God says it's wrong!"  Well does He?  I know that's what I've heard, and that's what I've been told.  I haven't investigated it for myself, and that's the plan.

Obviously I'm not going to come to a conclusion tonight.  Especially with Tylenol PM and warm milk onboard.  So this is just an icebreaker of a post letting you know that I plan on earnestly and honestly seeking answers.

Right off the bat I feel confused by this concept.  My mind and spirit is rather unsettled when I think about it.  It's almost like those bingo number juggler machines, but instead of numbers on the balls it is my opinion that's being tossed around.  At anytime one opinion might be closer to the top and ready to be picked.  I don't like that feeling.  It makes me feel wishy-washy.  So presently I'm juggling my upbringing, what I've always been taught about homosexuality/Gay Marriage, the balance of church vs. state, and ultimately trying to love like Christ would.

If I had to give you an answer right here and now, at 0300hrs on 05-13-12.  I would probably say that I think that being homosexual is a sin, but like any other sin.  I don't believe that there are levels of sin.  And "we all sin and have fallen short".  But then I'd also say that I think Gay Marriage can be and should be legalized by our government because it is a civil rights issue and our government shouldn't be used to uphold Christian morals.  Our government is (supposed to be) by the people and for the people, so that would mean our government should be like a mirror.  While most Americans claim they believe in God, the actual amount of Americans who are Christians and hold the belief that homosexuality is wrong and the government should crack down on it has to be small.  I think that the government can do its own thing without the Church agreeing.  After all we're "not of this world" right?  And there are many many things that our government (Republican or Democrat) does that we don't agree with, yet they do it anyways and we write it off.  Plus Christians don't say that atheists can't get married, shoot they don't even believe in God so they wouldn't agree that God ordained/created marriage, and that their marriage was a convenant between them, their spouse and God. 

This is going to be quite the process I'm thinking.  I'm not sure the format quite yet as to how I'm going to practice transparency during this time; whether to go point by point with all of you or just research it on my own and then give you my final essay.  Regardless I am bound to offend someone, shoot I might even lose a friend or two due to my journey.  I'll say right here and now that I am not trying to offend anyone, I am trying to solidify what I hold to be true.  And hopefully through this process I become more like Christ, who was unconventional, wise, bold, and self-sacrificially loving.  I fear that I/we don't have a solid grasp on who He was and that reflects on how we treat and love others, and how we interpret and respond to the Gospel.

Bon Voyage!